Saturday, July 29, 2006

And suddenly…

Yesterday I felt better. I know I’ve been feeling a bit better for a while, but that wasn’t better better, it was better in the sense that things were dulled. But yesterday I woke up and felt….heaven forbid…chirpy!

The reminder of what it’s like to approach the day with such a light feeling, was wonderful, and though the kids did their best to dissipate my mood, I wasn’t giving up! You see, once my mother arrived at 9, I was having the day off!!

From the kids, that is. As it was Friday and people need paying I still had to go to work for the morning, but that wasn’t a dampener as I love my job and my dim, quiet little office (home from home ;o)).

But something did happen at work that left me shaken and stammering. Earlier this week the boss’s wife invited me and mine to a barbeque, today, at their place. But not just us, it’s a party. And I think you lot know me well enough to realise I’m not someone who looks forward to large gatherings, compounded ten-fold when I don’t know anyone there. But it had been okay as the boss’s wife is a good friend and knows I’m skittish about such things, and quickly let me off the hook when my smile didn’t reach my eyes. Phew, she was great about it, and I soon forgot about it. Until yesterday, when the boss showed up. I was busy, head down, doing paperwork when he suddenly said his wife had mentioned I wasn’t ‘up to’ attending their barbeque, and he wanted to know why.

It’s safe to say I froze with complete horror! On the spot with someone I don’t know too well, with someone who’s about as outgoing as a person can be. I looked up like a rabbit caught in head-lights, as he calmly sat there watching me, completely oblivious to my rising panic at having to explain myself. I managed to stutter, ‘I’m actually very shy, can’t really cope with groups of people I don’t know.’

But that only made him laugh! I was dying of embarrassment at being put on the spot, and he was laughing!! ‘Is that what it is? What do you think will happen? Think my friends are going to point and laugh at you?’ he asked.

Which was really too much to ask, and I didn’t have an answer, well, except for my crimson face.

Thank goodness the man knows when to stop, because he stopped laughing and just shook his head with a grin.

Funny thing is, I think I like him more for asking. Like a hurdle of understanding if that makes any sense.

Anyway back to my day. My mood was still high, even a little amused at myself after my embarrassment, so I left the office at lunchtime and headed home with bounce in my step with the anticipation of an afternoon of nothingness.

But when I got home things were not as quiet as they should have been. The house still had three kids and a godmother in it! Putting on my best fake smile I approached with caution and was relieved to discover they were just waiting for Nana to arrive, which she did, an hour later.

Ho-hum, chin up and all that, I was still getting a couple of hours without the kids and my smile was genuine as I waved them off.

My mistake was lunch, a hurried bowl of cereal, and then I realised I hadn’t taken my tablet.

I’m not completely sure whether I can blame a stomach full of milk, but I’m reasonably sure it was, but within half an hour, I was less feeling chipper by the minute. I had heartburn like you wouldn’t believe and I didn’t dare lie down for fear everything would come up. Which, when I felt worse than I could imagine, I began to yearn for.

But I’m afraid of being sick. Much too close to the smell and sound, plus I have a lot of trouble stopping once I’ve started. I stood in front of the fan in the kitchen offering silent payers and curing my stupid medication. When I couldn’t stand it any longer I called the BH and asked him to bring home some Gaviscon in a vain hope it would work on the heartburn like it did when I was pregnant.

But it didn’t. I just felt worse and worse. It hurt to swallow, it hurt to move, everything burned. So I went to bed, and in a virtual sitting position, fell asleep.

I missed the kids return along with dinner, which there was no way I could have eaten anyway. And around nine last night, I got up and sipped on water, relieved that I did feel slightly better.

I feel almost okay again this morning, but I’m not looking forward to the medication at lunchtime, as I’m kind of afraid of it now (silly, I know).

And ultimately, I feel cheated! It’s not often I get an afternoon of nothingness and quiet and it was stolen from me.

Never mind, today’s another day and at least I get to go to work again on Monday, and hey, I still feel…not unhappy!


Blogger rdl said...

as the stones say" you can't always get what you want, but if you try... you might... getwhat you need. sorry you felt sick but sounds like you needed the sleep. call yr. dr. about the symptoms tho, maybe another med is in order. some meds you should take with food but taking it with should not cause such distress. I take mine with nothing no problem - that is when i remember. going to take it now.

Saturday, July 29, 2006 1:30:00 pm  
Blogger Tim-tambolini said...

Arggghhhh! I read the comment above and was reminded, yet again, of the Rolling Stones coming to Saskatchewan in October. Every radio station is playing every song they ever did and it's driving me nuts because I don't even like them much.

Anyway, sorry Jona, that your great day turned ugly, but I'm sure you needed the nap that you eventually got and you'll have many more days of high spirits.

Saturday, July 29, 2006 10:06:00 pm  
Blogger MarkD60 said...

I'm glad you were feeling better and it seems like you're on the rise.
I am lactose intolerant and drink soymilk.

It sounds like you and your boss are both very straightforward and open. I think that's good.

Sunday, July 30, 2006 11:52:00 am  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

That's too bad, when a great day turns to horrors.

But there will be other days -- some of them nice!

Sunday, July 30, 2006 7:32:00 pm  
Blogger Sam said...

Oh, so sorry about losing a rest day!
I'm glad you're feeling better - and hopefully you'll have another rest day soon!!!!

Monday, July 31, 2006 1:14:00 pm  
Blogger No_Newz said...

Not unhappy is good, right. :) How often do you get a good afternoon of rest? You probably needed that more than you know. I hope today finds your feeling tiptop and not unhappy.
Lois Lane

Monday, July 31, 2006 4:47:00 pm  
Blogger oopseedaisee said...

Sorry your day didnt quite go as planned. Glad you were feeling more chipper. At least being in a good state of mind helps everything else stay in proportion!
Have a good week.

Monday, July 31, 2006 8:19:00 pm  
Blogger Southern Sweetheart said...

aggg heartburn. hate that lady. I'm glad you're feeling better and that you're looking up. :)

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 2:54:00 am  
Blogger Kuntry Konfession said...

heard crackers helps heartburns-one that has no salt in it?! i was wondering if u might be low on iron-sometimes it makes you real tired...stop by the health store and get some input about green (Spirulina?) drinks. (helps moods, mind and body) i hope u don't mind, but i'd say u need a vacation and a spa where u can get a whole body massage. need some quiet,rest&relaxation!

Wednesday, August 02, 2006 7:54:00 am  
Blogger g said...

i don't know why we should have to ~explain~ why we don't want to go to parties where we don't know anyone. people are different. that's just the way it is.

Tuesday, August 08, 2006 12:51:00 am  

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