Anticipation

Is the waiting for an event which isn’t longed for, called anticipation? I’m thinking (as I like the word so much) anticipation is reserved for good things, and I love the feeling of anticipation. The way it builds and fills you with warmth as an event gets closer. And tomorrow is getting awfully close! Though if anything, I’m getting a tad over-warm, but I don’t think that’s the anticipation, I think it’s the dread.

I’ve had a few people comment to me today, that I must be excited about the upcoming arrival of our puppy-with-no-name. And I am. Desperately so! In fact, at the weekend, the BH was so amused with my preparations that he announced that he thinks this dog will be spoilt. He will.

Every so often it stops me in my tracks to think that I didn’t spoil Ryker, I can’t even remember bringing him home. But then I can’t remember bringing two of the kids home, and there’s no guarantee I’ll remember this pups arrival either, so I’ll not worry about that. And as for the spoiling, Ryker wasn’t the type to be jealous and he got spoilt too, just more so in the later years. But I do feel like crying over him again. I’m not going to allow myself. It’s silly, and I’ve made my peace with the sudden changes that came.

The future’s bright, and it’s just about here!

Only the dread to get through. That’s what’s grounding me so completely. I want tomorrow to come, but I don’t. I’ve got to be at the airfield by 8.30 because the pilot doesn’t think the weather will be with us, and there’s a commercial pilot coming along too, so we can take off in fog. Great, just great.

Do little planes go above the cloud cover? Guess by this time tomorrow I’ll know. But I hope so. Better if I can’t see the ground*.

Anyway I should know the answer to that already, as a friend flew us to Paris on our honeymoon. But I can’t remember it! Why is my memory so crap? Maybe my mind has blotted it out because it was so horrid! Then again, if that was true, my mind would have blotted out a flight from Amsterdam, so maybe it’s just age.

Oh bugger. I’ve got to get on a plane tomorrow. And I can’t comfort myself with the thought I can bottle it**, as I’m the only one with a valid passport***, apart from R (and he’s too young to go instead ;o)). Not that I would – as I get to come home with a puppy!

Oh how I love the anticipation!!


* So don’t expect pictures, even if the weather is fabulous!

** This is not intended as a pun regarding my 'personal' concerns. The again, it kinda works ;o)

*** On a commercial flight I wouldn’t need my passport to travel to the UK (and I could request an aisle seat!) but for some reason I haven’t yet figured out, I've been told I need it tomorrow.


Yes I'm going a tad mad with the *s, but sometimes I like them, so there!