Wednesday, July 06, 2005

I have questions.

Why do toads like to spend the night on my front step?

Why do the dogs on my road all poop in my garden?

Why don’t children tell you they need the toilet, with no less than 23 seconds to spare?

Why is there always someone in a public toilet when you need one?

Why is tip-ex so hard to get off?

Why does the covering on kitchen cupboards come off before tip-ex?

Why won’t red wash-out acrylic paint wash out of clothes?

How does a tissue always get in the wash?

Why can’t Carla ever get to nursery on time?

Why does Carla think I care that her little monster darling won’t sit in his booster seat when she’s blocking the nursery school entrance?

Why do weeds grow better than any plant in my garden?

Why are little girls’ whines so much more irritating than little boys?

Who thought it would be a good idea to put heels on little girls’ shoes?

Why do little girls’ think stomping their feet and shouting ‘You’re a horrid mummy’ in the middle of a shop, will entice you to give in?

Why show adverts for 12 certificate films when Miffy is on?

Why, when you’re blocking the car park entrance, is your child’s class always the last out?

Why does the fill up truck always get to the petrol station before me and block the entrance just as I’m about to run out of petrol?

Why aren’t tampon boxes childproof?

Why did I pay for box of tampons when half rolled away on shop floor?

Why is the only person to help pick up tampons, a gorgeous bloke in a suit?

Why can’t I open no-spill beakers without spilling the contents?

Who designed waxed milk cartons? And what the f*** were they thinking of?

Why doesn’t the chicken last to the use by date on the packaging?

Why can’t four children agree on less than three meals for dinner? And why do two change their minds as the food is served?

Why do children always sing at the top of their out-of-tune-voices when you have a headache?

Why do children always make you feel wretched by saying ‘I love you, mommy’ right after you’ve told them of?

Why does the spider hide until I’m shampooing my hair?

What does non-slip mean if you can slip?

Why is it only Wednesday?

1 Comments:

Blogger Lita said...

I am still looking for the missing mate of a sock that was sucked into the vortex of my clothes dryer. Another one of life's little mysteries.

Friday, July 08, 2005 8:59:00 pm  

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